Psychologist, Larry Crabb, cuts to the heart of the biblical view of marriage: the “one flesh” relationship. In The Marriage Builder, he first deals with the principle of oneness. His thesis is that the deepest needs of human personality – security and significance – ultimately cannot be met by a marriage partner. It requires turning to the Lord rather than one’s spouse, which frees both partners to commit to minister to the spouse’s needs rather than manipulating to meet one’s own needs.
Differentiating between goals and desires, moreover, enables you to overcome blocked communication, faulty reminders, and past failures in restoring a meaningfully happy marriage relationship.
The second part of this book presents the three building blocks essential to constructing marriage: the grace of God, true marriage commitment, and acceptance of one’s mate.
Various exercises help one understand how to build or rebuild a marriage, even when one spouse chooses not to cooperate. Also helpful to counselors.